If you’re in search of a valentine, check out the 7 spots US News & World Report have selected — and start booking your flights NOW
Valentine’s Day can really suck if you’re single. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ve heard the old song and dance of ‘it’s a commercial holiday fabricated by Hallmark’ so many times it feels like a really crappy Beach Boys record is skipping in my brain. No matter which way you look at it, V-Day is like D-day for singles. You’re forced to watch couples hold hands, look deeply into each others eyes and see other women get gifted with diamonds. You watch that harassed boyfriend running home from work holding a bouquet of red roses wondering why it isn’t you that’s receiving them. Well this year, I say get OVER IT — and take action! Unless you want to have a totally sad ‘single girls night out’ (sorry ladies, but there is nothing more desperate than having to prove you’re happy with your manless state) where you drink too much and tell your worst ‘he did what’ stories, I suggest you book a quickie flight and head on over to one of these seven destinations, of which U.S. News & World Report have dubbed the seven best cities to be single. And to help you out, I’ve compiled a list of cool, non-tragic things you can do in each city come Feb. 14. I love playing cupid!
#7 ATLANTA, GEORGIA
Atlanta is called ‘Hot-lanta’ for a reason, right? But where do you go to meet studly single dudes?
- Start your night off right at Midtown’s Halo lounge, which is apparently popping on a Monday night. Although Valentine’s happens to land on the shittiest day of the week this year, at least you’ll be assured a good time at Halo (as long as you’re not being an angel, that is).
- Buckhead’s Whiskey Blue on the top floor of the W Hotel is where you’ll find a plethora of besuited businessmen, so put on something with a plunging neckline and race over post-work for a (possibly) early night. Make sure what you’re wearing isn’t red or pink, please.
- Q100 Atlanta is hosting their annual Bitterball on Feb. 12 at Gold Room. Apparently, this is where you can dance away your misery at being Valentine-less and get drunk enough to take home a perfect stranger. Just sayin’.
- Dr. Sketchy presents the St. Valentine’s Massacre sounds like the kind of party I’d want to be at come Feb. 14. Not only are you celebrating the bloodiest day in recent V-day history, but you also get to walk around a room with faux tommy guns. Wouldn’t it be excellent if your ex also attended?
#6 WASHINGTON, D.C.
- Recreate your college days and take a ride on the Boomerang party bus, which makes drunken, debaucherous pitstops at D.C.’s hottest bars. Granted, it’s a Monday night — but Valentine’s Day is always a good excuse to call in sick to work the next day (it always makes me sick, at least).
- If you can’t join ‘em, learn how to get ‘em! Check out the 3rd annual ‘Art of Flirting event at iCi Urban Bistro where you’ll learn to saber (behead, how fitting!) a bottle of champagne, memorize love quotes from Pablo Neruda, learn the real story of St. Valentine and eat a shit ton of chocolate at the Sofitel in Lafayette Square. Bliss.
- Cosmopolitans with your girlfriends is way too Sex & the City 2 (re: cheesy) so do the opposite if you need to get all liquored up to survive V-Day. Head to one of the city’s grimiest yet most fun dive bars, The Pour House, for some PBR or Jagermeister, and you might just meet the hipster of your dreams (the unfortunate part of this being he may also fit in your skinny jeans).
# 5 BARCELONA, SPAIN
In addition to lustfully gazing at photos of Cristiano Ronaldo who will, unfortunately and undoubtedly be frolicking with some supermodel somewhere on Feb. 14, there are plenty of other hot Spanish men near the sea. The good news about spending V-Day in Barcelona is that the Spaniards celebrate their version of Valentine’s Day, La Diada de Sant Jordi (St. George’s Day) on April 23, so there will be very few Catalonians getting friskier than normal. However, to make extra sure you don’t see any loved-up couples, steer clear of Montjuic Castle and Parc Guell.
# 4 CHICAGO, ILLINOIS
- FIST PUMP! Celebrate your inner Guido with Vinny from Jersey Shore at Enclave on Feb. 12 – and thank your lucky stars you’re single and NOT dating a Jersey boy.
- Bad ass. Pretend you’re a motorcycle mama and join the Harley crew for ‘Burning Love’ at The Abbey. It’s an anti-Valentine’s Day shindig, and Sailor Jerry is involved. Again, another reason to be glad you’re single!
- Do NOT set foot near Millennium Park‘s ice-skating rink. You want to avoid that Serendipity-esque starry-eyed lover thing as long as you can on Monday.
# 3 REYKJAVIK, ICELAND
There are 22 hours of night during Valentine’s Day in Reykjavik, which should fit your mood appropriately and, according to US News & World Report, you have to actively TRY to be lonely come Feb. 14. Walk into any bar on Laugavegur, the city’s main street, after midnight and announce to the crowd of attractive men, ‘I’m single, and Valentine’s Day is over. Let’s drink!’ Do not be dressed like Bjork and you’ll be a surefire hit.
# 2 SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA
- Someone else’s pain is sure to make you feel better, no? Those who are brave enough to ‘fess up about being unlucky in love share their stories at the Doomed Valentine’s Show at Shattuck Down Low. Suddenly, your life sucks a lot less.
- 5a5 is having a fun anti-V-Day party with a color-coded system. A hint of red means you’re taken, a hint of yellow means ‘it’s complicated’ and a hint of green means you’re single and ready to mingle. Let’s hope the guys attending aren’t colorblind.
- San Fran is the America’s home of homosexuals, so head down to the Castro and enjoy being single with the boys. Stay away from all public bathhouses, please.
#1 RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL
Like Spain, Brazil’s answer to Valentine’s Day, Dia dos Namorados (Lovers Day) falls in June, so you don’t have to worry about couples petting heavier than usual (hey, it is Brazil we’re talking about) in front of you. If it’s some flirting and soul-stroking you’re looking for come Valentine’s Day in this sexy city, head over to Shenanigan’s Irish Bar or Emporio in Ipanema to mix with foreigners and locals alike. And, at long last, you can always say you celebrated Valentine’s Day by being someone’s ‘Girl From Ipanema.’