Kristen Wiig’s new film isn’t primarily about male/female relationships, but I did take this dating tip away from it…
When I saw Kristen Wiig‘s new ‘comedy’ Bridesmaids on Friday night, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that it wasn’t actually about getting married, but about growing up and moving on and the shifting nature of female friendships. If you haven’t seen it, please do — but it might be a bit painful to watch if you’re the single girl who’s friends all seem to be getting married, having kids and moving away. That said, Saturday Night Live’s Wiig, who plays maid-of-dishonor Annie, has co-written an awesome script, and the experiences she acts out are all painfully true to life: namely, her relationship with Ted, a guy she really likes who considers her to be nothing more than his ‘f**k buddy.’ Ouch.
Her scenes with Ted, played by hunky he-man Jon Hamm, are excruciating to watch. Annie sneaks into the bathroom to put on makeup so that he’ll see her looking great in the morning, pretends she doesn’t care when he says things like, ‘I don’t know how to put this nicely, but can you leave?’ and refuses to go to her best friend’s wedding when she invites him by saying, ‘I’m looking out for you! I wouldn’t want you to have to explain me as your ‘f**k buddy.’
So why do women do this? What are we getting out of it? If a man wants you for nothing more than a quick shag, why demean yourself by participating over and over again?
Just like the ‘friend with benefits’, there really isn’t any rhyme or reason to being the F friend. He isn’t your friend or he wouldn’t be treating you so casually. You probably have feelings for him, which you might not even admit to your best friend, knowing full well how wrong that would be after the pathetic way he treats you.
I’m always amazed when I hear a woman boldly say that she’s in charge of the relationship, that she is the one pulling the sexual pal card. However, I don’t entirely believe her. If that’s really what you want and you’re sure you won’t get your heart crushed, go for it. Just make sure you’ve got a really, really big bandaid handy.