If you thought your first date with a dude sucked, you’re not alone

I went on my first and only blind date when I was living in Manhattan circa 2006. Although at 5’1 I myself am horizontally challenged, I have a thing for guys who are at least six foot. So imagine my surprise when I walked into west village dive The Half Pint and discovered that the bar we had agreed upon, had a very apt name indeed. My date couldn’t have been more than 5’3. Yep, from the get-go I already knew it was going to be a bad night. Through the course of 45 minutes, the guy insulted me, my job and my opinions. He was a balding egomaniac with a mommy’s boy complex, and I couldn’t stand him. I made an excuse for ending the evening early and proceeded to walk in the opposite direction so that I wouldn’t have to endure him for a second longer than I absolutely had to. I wish that FirstDateHell had existed back then, although I don’t think I could have confined my bile to 140 characters at the time.

FirstDateHell is a cool concept. We all have war stories, and now we have a place to share them. Consider this Twitter page to be a community for the formerly unhappy; you’ll be happy to realize that you’re not alone and that others might even have had it worse than you.

Good Morning America recently ran a segment on the Tweet-friendly forum, which launched earlier this month. It, and its sister site,, were founded by London-based columnist and tech writer Rhodri Marsden.

Marsden launched the site after remembering a particularly bad date that still, to this day, makes him cringe. His lone tweet prompted so many responses from his 17,000 followers that he decided to set up FirstDateHell as a platform for dating discussion.

“I think us British can be so emotionally feeble… we can have such a constipated communication problem. So we have trouble saying to people’s faces ‘Look, this isn’t working, nice to meet you, but I’m going home.’ Instead, we sit there for hours with someone dreadful. As a result we might become terribly unhappy, but boy, do we pick up some good stories,” Marsden said in an email to when discussing why the site works, in particular, for his native Brits.

It isn’t just the Brits that have a problem with communicating, though. Terrible first dates are something everyone can respond to. You’re telling me there isn’t a woman in India meeting her husband-to-be for the first time going, ‘Oh crap. I can’t believe I’m stuck with this guy. He picks his nose in public and smells like he has foot fungus. Damn my life to hell, I’m supposed to marry this assclown?’

Or what about the die-hard online daters, who finally met HotBlueEyedGuy63 for the first time, only to discover the nine photos he posted were from 1997, his paunch exceeded his brains or you had a hard time deciding which bothered you more — his liver spots or his receding hairline. I bet their FirstDateHell stories would be entertaining as, well, hell.

The point is, regardless of how painful all of these evenings may have been, they’re providing us with a community, with laughter (albeit at the misfortune of others) and the knowledge that things could, indeed, be worse. It makes me feel better to tell you all my war story about the mama’s boy midget. Unfortunately, I still have the battle scar to go with it.


Have a horrible dating story? Tell me about it!

Check Out The Top Seven FirstDateHell Tweets

1.DewGirl99: “1st date asked me at dinner if my breasts were real. Said he would only date me if they were implants. Told him he would never know.”

2. Kristainchicago: “First date. asked my age. Me: “32, why?” Him: “Well, I really want kids and at 32, your ovaries are dying.”

3. Squarish: “One of my recent worst was when I went back to the guy’s place & he put ‘Top Gun’ on & recited it word for word.”

4. Redcath: “He called 10mins before 2ask if I was running late, picked fight with stranger for looking at him, said aliens are in the Bible”

5. ElaineRonson: “Had a date with with a yogi. Bought me an ice-cream; took me to see his Buddha shrine; told me he’d taken vow of celeibacy; then jumped me.”

6.elle_c_emm: “Met guy at his flat, opened door in blue check fleece dressing gown and an electronic tag on his ankle, “Shall we just stay in?”

7. Eirlysbellin: “I went on a blind date wearing a bright pink blazer & jeans. I turned up to find my date wearing exactly the same thing. “

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7 Responses
  1. Carolyn says:

    Hilarious I love this site! And yours too :)

  2. Paula says:

    Laura- this was great- I think you could create an entire book of bad first date experiences- brought to mind of one of own…ew… definitely don’t want to go there!

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