Meet the Domi Dollz — who will help empower you, educate you about men…and whip them (literally) into shape

When you think dominatrixes, you think of scary women in black leather with whips and chains who are going to beat you up and possibly destroy your soul, right? Get over it. The Domi Dollz are modern day doms all about teaching you self-respect, empowerment and how to get what you want from the men in your life — and two of the gals were kind enough to share their badass words of wisdom. I hope you’re feeling frisky…

According to the Dollz’ declaration, they’re revamping and elevating the Kinky Scene and taking it mainstream through a variety of workshops, events, fashion and music. They want to create a world where we’re open to exploring sensuality and fantasies without judgement. Who can argue with that?

The following tips are from Ms. Nina Payne. Heed her advice — because this Domi Doll always gets exactly what she wants...and you can, too.

Courtesy of Simone HoSang

In a world where there is so much pressure for men to always be in control, as well as masculine and powerful, it isn’t hard to understand why I’m so successful as a dominatrix. Sometimes people need a break from being themselves. It’s a welcome change for a man to allow the woman to be in charge, to be the aggressor. To feel out of control can be very exciting.

After being a professional Dom for nine years I’ve learned many things in the dungeon that carry over into my everyday (a.k.a. vanilla) life, which is why I now conduct workshops for women interested in learning the art of dominance. Here are some basic tips in seduction from the creme de le creme of dominatrixes — moi.

1. STYLE

Don’t worry — you don’t have to spend a lot of money on a latex catsuit to create a dominant look.  Remember that men are very visual beings and the aim is to create a wardrobe that emphasizes confidence and mystery while still retaining your femininity. You probably have clothes at home that will work, such as black mini or pencil skirt, black stockings, black stilettos or black over-the-knee boots. You’re probably noticing that black is the staple color in the dominatrix’s closet. If you are able to incorporate a PVC belt or leather gloves – even better! If you know your date is a leg man, use that to your advantage and wear something form-fitting that shows off your pins. Leave the floral sundress at home and play up the “bad girl with class” image. Whatever you choose to wear, it should make you feel sexy and empowered.

2. PERSONALITY

Clothing is really a secondary concern and should be used as a tool to reel them in, not as the feature attraction. The thing that makes the dominatrix a dominatrix is her dominant attitude. A common misconception is that the Mistress is a demanding and scary bitch. This does not have to be the case and will probably scare off your prey if you come on too strong. It’s all about confidence. That said, I like to think of myself as royalty. Perhaps a naughty queen – oozing sex appeal, but still classy, intelligent and polished. I always teach ladies in my workshops that they already hold all the cards and the guy is always looking for direction from you. If you act like a queen, you will be treated that way.

3. TALK THE TALK

When I’m in the dungeon, what I say and how I say it determines the type of Mistress I am. This is what we doms call “verbal”. The same can be said about the dating world and how you want to come across to your potential boy-toy. Being loud and swearing will compromise your position of power and should be avoided. Instead, experiment with tone and volume. Sometimes whispering in his ear is an effective in drawing a boy into your web.  Learning to talk the talk is always the most difficult lesson in my classes – but it’s all about saying what you want and knowing how to get it. Never underestimate the power of suggestion. Do your research, and find out if your man has some specific sexual interests or kinks. Then have some fun by using your verbal skills and playing head games by taunting him with his own desires: “If you’re a good boy then maybe later I will…”

4. SENSUALITY IS KEY

To a large degree, sensuality is all about the art of tease. It engages his senses and gives you the means to create sexual tension. Laying all your cards on the table and becoming too available will end the seduction dance.  I always keep my pets in suspense by switching it up. Coming on hot and then the next moment be elusive – they never know what to think and it intrigues them. Since the dominatrix never has sex while in session with her slave, it’s all about the tease and using our sensuality to stimulate all five of his senses. What does he see? Smell? When can he touch? Taste? He may be frustrated by the tormenting, but it’s better than him being bored by you because gave away all your secrets too quickly.

5. IMAGINATION

Imagination is really the most important aspect of seduction should you want to dominate your partner. If you’re going to be in control behind closed doors, then it’s up to you how things go down. Don’t forget that. It’s time to think outside the box. Remember to always start things off  in a light way and work your way up to more intense play. Perhaps you can start off by just using your verbal skills while whispering all of the naughty things you want to do to him. Then slowly turn up the heat and get a bit more physical. Perhaps you can use his necktie to bind his arms behind his back, while you do a little strip tease and show off your sexy black bra, panties and garters. Just don’t give it all away too quickly: a dominatrix always has her boys begging for more.

Kisses & Spanks!

Nina Payne and her collaborator/partner-in-crime Mona Rogers

If you are interested in learning more specific techniques and cultivating your dominant skills, check out our website and schedule a one-on-one training or join our next workshop in a city near you: www.DomiDollz.com.

The Domi Dollz have hosted events at NYC spots like Coco de Mer, Kiki de Montparnasse and The Box.

Courtesy of Simone HoSang, Mona Rogers

Courtesy of Simone HoSang, Nina Payne

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16 Responses
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  13. Angie says:

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  14. martyboy says:

    Id love to have a hot dom whip me into shape ive never experienced having a dominatrix before but all this talk is making me wanna go out and get a good beating lol

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