Vow to make someone else happy

Before we discuss anything of importance, let’s get this out of the way, shall we? Happy Valentine’s Day! May you spend the day sucking face with the human of your dreams over bottles of bubbly and boxes of bon bons. Amen.

Now here’s where I get serious. February 14 is the one day a year where love and romance is feted above all else. Some choose not to acknowledge it at all, while others go overboard. Then, there are the singletons who celebrate to spite the holiday, dressing up in their shortest LBD’s and raising toasts to themselves, a la Jessica Biel‘s anti-V-day party in the cheesy-yet-kind-of-fabulous-romantic comedy Valentine’s Day.

It was a tough job deciding what I was going to write today. I could have been a bummer and listed divorce stats, or preached to about the art of the perfect gift (FYI — hand-picked wildflowers from your neighbor’s garden will do), or what options a singleton has…besides getting drunk and making bad decisions, that is.

None of these options sounded all that appealing, so I decided to write about Cupid, instead. Cupid is a chubby little fellow best known as the Roman god of desire, affection and erotic love. His mama is Venus, goddess of hope, and father is Mars, the god of war.

Cupid’s story goes like this: There was once a beautiful princess name Psyche, who was so beloved by her subjects that they forgot to worship Venus. Venus, being a vengeful old bitch, ordered her son to make Psyche fall in love with the ugliest thing in the world. But whoopsie! Little Cupid had a massive old fail, when upon trying to sneak into Psyche’s room to shoot her with a golden arrow, scratched himself instead and fell deeply in love with her.

He visited her while she slept every single night, but hid in the darkness so that she might never see him. Her sisters pushed her to go against his wishes, and he was so furious that he up and left. Psyche couldn’t get Cupid out of her head, and traveled around the world to find him.  Finally, Jupiter, the leader of the gods, gave Psyche the gift of immortality so that they could be together forever. So the story goes, the lovers had a daughter, Voluptas, or Hedone, (meaning pleasure) and Psyche became a goddess.

Although it was Jupiter, in fact, who played matchmaker in this situation, Cupid (known in Greek mythology as Eros), is actually best known for bringing people together.

I try to play Cupid on a daily basis, even if my matches don’t always work out.

On this day of love and romance, I issue a challenge to all your loved up, happily ensconced people out there: why don’t you take a minute away from locking lips to to think about your poor, Valentine-less pals?

By God, people, if you’ve gotten single guy friends, set your single girl friends up! For example, I was hanging out with my friend Jess one day, when she ran into a herd of men she knew on the beach. I was like, “Hello! Where did they come from?” Jess, totally obliviously, said, “Oh, those guys? I hang out with them all the time!” And where was my invite, hm?

My point is this: our taken friends are usually sitting on a wealth of untapped resources, and they aren’t always immediately going to put two and two together and realize that you + one of their hot friends of the opposite sex might be a good match.

Which is why I’m urging the singles out there to tell your friends to take their heads out of their asses, cut through the fog of love and think about something besides their own happiness for once.

I think we’d all be a lot happier if Valentine’s Day was more about finding love for others than putting pressure on your own relationship to make the day perfect, don’t you?

After all, Valentine’s Day is about celebrating romantic love — no one ever said it had to be your own.