What you should do when he gets distant
According to John Gray, men are like rubber bands. Though I could think of a million more words to describe the male specifies (none of them being very flattering at the moment), the Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus author might just be on to something. You know, aside from being a best-selling author and relationship guru, that is.
In the book, he states the following: “Men are like rubber bands. When they pull away they can stretch only so far before they come springing back.”
He goes on to say that this a natural reaction, and it’s the way that male intimacy cycle works. Guys get close, they pull away, get come back.
Gray says we misinterpret this ‘pulling away’ and get all hurt. Sorry buddy, but why should we sit patiently when a guy who’s promised us the moon and stars gets gun shy all of a sudden and runs in the opposite direction? My wise ass mouth wants to tell the men in question to grow a pair and buck up, and tell all the women who are confused and hurt to move on.
But alas, the guru says we should wait it out, that “distance makes the heart grow stronger.”
I guess what it comes down to is whether or not the man in question is really worth it. If his fear of intimacy sends him running in the opposite direction, is that someone you really want to be with in the long run? Or is Gray right — and if we allow them the opportunity to miss us in the first place, they’ll finally be able to feel their own “passionate longing for love”?
All these games give me a headache. John Gray, you might be right about this, but I really hope you’re not. Because if so, you probably should have named your book “Men May Be From Mars, but They Only Think With their Penis.”